Speed Bracer

Saw SPEED RACER. Best reunion of the Osmond Family look-alikes I’ve ever seen. Including Chim Chim. Didn’t Susan Sarandon once play Jane Goodall? No, that was Sigourney Weaver as Dian Fossey. The bad guy looks like Tim Curry, but isn’t. Still, you know he’s the bad guy by virtue of the resemblance. I tell you what, though, if my car breaks down, I’m taking it to John Goodman Tire. He can build a car in 32 hours! From scrap!

For a fast-paced car, it sure is a slow movie. The slipstream editing leaves you wondering if someone forgot to press “compile”. I’m not sure it was meant for human consumption; though I’m positive a computer could understand it. The first third of the movie is presented as if time does not exist. Director Wachowski pushes lack of chronology past the margin of artistic, and into confusing. The movie is incorrectly rated PG, when it should have been PhD for cognitive ability required.

Go go see SPEED RACER! Nice Mormon family like that with five kids, including a chimpanzee and spittle in the trunk. And Susan Sarandon doesn’t look a day older than her plastic surgery.